Smiling Again!

We needed today. We needed today to be a success and it was! First of all, I called the nurse this morning and talked to her about the changes we've made in an effort to work with her as she asked. Pete's been giving shots. We've talked to Noah a lot about trusting the nurses at the school. Got his supply kit ready and are waiting on the fax from Peoria to finish up the paperwork. She was pleased. I talked to her about Noah needing me there today. There was no argument or concern, she said that was fine and that, in itself, was a HUGE load off!! I went in at 11:30 for the glucose test. I sat to the side and let them handle it and they did a great job and Noah was perfection. Didn't flinch or cry or get freaked out at all, like he did last Tuesday. Hooray! Then it was on to lunch. He was most nervous going in today about that insulin shot. I, again, tried to stay out of the way and sat on the other side of the table. He was very scared for that and cried and kept pulling away. I eventually moved over to where he was sitting and tried to hold him, but he didn't like that, so I pushed myself back out of the way to let the nurse handle it. He told the nurse how we did it, so she asked me what we do. I told her our methods and she used it and eventually Noah stopped pulling away, so she could do it and it didn't hurt at all! So, now he feels way better about her giving shots too. He even told me afterwards that I didn't need to come in anymore. That he could do it himself. WOW! I'm hoping that means he'll be calmer, watch his tone with her, and just let it happen. I have a feeling there will still be bumps as he gets over his fear of the shots, but just him telling me I didn't need to come anymore was a big deal and seeing how the nurses were listening to me and working with us both and showing that compassion for his fears like I asked on Tuesday, REALLY makes me feel better about how this relationship between us will go moving forward. I'm hoping that the conversation(s) we had last week were made at a time when she was very frustrated and felt the need to get it off her chest with me. While, I still don't think it was appropriate, I also feel that wasn't really her and now after a couple days of reflection for both of us, we're at a place where we will work closely together and make it work best for Noah, which is all I wanted from the beginning. So, I'm looking forward to the weekend as we continue to work him through those fears and hopefully optimistic that he's going to be the brave kid I know he can be and move forward without any problems. I'm more realistic this time that there are to be bumps in the road, no matter how hard I try, and that, while criticism is still going to be hard to take, it's ok if my efforts aren't always successful. I need to know I'm doing the best I can and that has to be enough for now. That's not something I accept easily either. I'm trying to take some of that perfectionistic pressure off of myself and let God be my guide and my strength when I don't feel like I have any more. So, I'm back on top of the hill. Hopefully for a while, but when the valleys come, I at least know I'm not alone. Thanks for all the concern and kind words when I was struggling. And, thanks for letting me use this forum to vent about this journey we're on. Like I said on Facebook, I'm looking forward to the day when diabetes isn't the first thing on my mind when I wake up and last thing I think about as I fall asleep. I'm looking forward to posts about wedgies and silliness again soon!